


Starting Things

by thesecretdoor



Category: Johnny's Entertainment, KAT-TUN (Band), Kanjani8 (Band)
Genre: Light Angst, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-14
Updated: 2012-09-24
Packaged: 2019-03-28 05:46:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13897572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesecretdoor/pseuds/thesecretdoor
Summary: Written foryukitsubutefor theFUND-RAISING FOR HABAGAT FLOOD VICTIMS$1-for-a-drabble fic event. I hope this is close enough to your prompt!!





	1. It Started with a Kiss

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [](http://yukitsubute.livejournal.com/profile)[**yukitsubute**](http://yukitsubute.livejournal.com/) for the [FUND-RAISING FOR HABAGAT FLOOD VICTIMS](http://help-pilipinas.livejournal.com/5280.html) $1-for-a-drabble fic event. I hope this is close enough to your prompt!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It started with a kiss, a kiss they were both too proud to admit they had wanted.

It started with a kiss, an apparently accidental one, and Kame hadn’t been able to sort out his feelings since.

~~~

“Don’t flatter yourself” Ryo had snapped at him “I was just leaning in to say something when Uchi pushed me”

Kame laughed to hide the smile that had been trying to spread its way across his face. “Like I want to kiss you anyway.”

“Good, then we can just forget about it then” Ryo retorted and he turned to storm off, his cheeks glowing just a little too red.

~~~

That had been 6 years ago and a lot had changed since then, almost everything about Kame’s world was different, but not his feelings for Ryo.

He couldn’t even tell when his crush on Ryo had started, maybe the moment their lips touched, maybe before that even, but there was just something about the other man that Kame wanted more of.

~~~

Ryo thought about that kiss more often than he should, it was nothing, he was young and it was just a peck, nothing compared to the things he’d done since, but it worried him a little just how often he did think of it.

He’d meant to do it, but he would never admit to that.

It had been at a party, a celebration for KAT-TUN’s debut he supposed, and the mood had been so light and fun, everyone smiling, enjoying themselves, and Kame’s face was shining with a happiness Ryo hadn’t seen in too long. He’d always watched Kame closely, he saw when he was stressed, over-worked, could tell when he hadn’t had enough sleep, and seeing Kame’s radiant smile that day had made him so happy that he’d acted without even thinking.

Only Kame’s face…the shocked expression he wore as Ryo opened his eyes, it terrified him and he made one of the biggest mistakes of his life, he lied about it.

~~~

It still confuses Kame sometimes, on the odd occasion he and Ryo end up in the same work event, the way Ryo constantly looks over at him, he can see it out of the corner of his eye, but every time he turns to flash a smile at Ryo, he catches the other man quickly turning the other way. It’s confusing, and in a strange way it kind of hurts.

There are times he just wants to storm over to Ryo and ask him what his deal is, but in all honesty Ryo is never hostile to him when they talk, he’s still the same grinning, chatty man who seems to care maybe a little too much about how much rest Kame is managing to get. He feels like a yo-yo, Ryo’s ambivalent attitude towards him makes him dizzy and excited in all the strangest ways.

~~~

He knew he’d blown it the second Kame laughed in his face. What could have been a sweet confession of his feelings became just another awkward memory, and he was too afraid to let that happen again. His own pride caused him to keep Kame at arm’s length.

He accepted that he’d ruined his chances, not that he expected Kame to reciprocate his feelings anyway, but it would have been nice to know either way. Since then he’d settled for being as close to a friend as he could manage in their hectic lives, while secretly hoarding whatever magazines and DVDs he could and watching Kame as closely as he could get away with when they were together.

He was proud of Kame, he respected and admired him for all of his achievements, but he couldn’t help that pang of regret that came with each new project, feeling like Kame was getting one step further from his grasp.

~~~

He just wants to know. Ryo has been acting more and more distant recently, each friendly smile tainted with a little sadness, he’s been pondering the idea for a while, that maybe Ryo likes him, that maybe he always had, but if there’s one thing Kame doesn’t want to appear as, it’s vain.

It’s his pride more than anything that’s been stopping him from just approaching Ryo, what if he admits his feelings, asks Ryo if he feels the same way, and Ryo laughs at him, spreads the word around that Kame thinks everyone must be in love with him.

He shudders, pushing the thought from his mind, he has to know.

He can see Ryo now, they’re at another party, it’s a celebration for something some of the juniors have done, he loses track of them sometimes since there’s so many now, but he didn’t want to seem like one of those sempai that don’t get involved.

He’s had just a little too much to drink he thinks, he’s not drunk, just at that fine line between knowing something is stupid and planning the best way to do it anyway. He takes a deep breath and prepares to bite the bullet.

“Ryo” he calls out as he crosses the room, and then he sees his chance and fakes a stumble on a bottle left strewn across the carpet. He falls and Ryo rushes forward to catch him, smushing his nose against Kame’s cheek, and Kame thinks for a moment that he missed his chance.

But then their eyes lock and their shy smiles mirror each others, he doesn’t know who leans in first, and he doesn’t care who’s watching, nothing matters beside the lips closing over his own, the way they should have been doing for years.  
  



	2. It Started with a Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It started with a confession, one that came 6 years too late.

It started with a confession, one that came 6 years too late.

“Ryo wait” Kame moaned, hands pushing gently against Ryo’s shoulder. “I need to know first…that kiss…”

“I meant to do it” Ryo replied, resuming his kisses across Kame’s jaw, but Kame’s hands were still pushing him back. He stopped his actions, focusing completely on the man beneath him, the way his brow furrowed cutely in confusion, his lips pouty. “I mean I didn’t plan to do it…I was just so happy and I got swept up in the moment and I just did it.”

He leaned in to kiss Kame again, but Kame’s words this time halted him “Did you like me?”

He took a moment for his head to clear again “Yes, I don’t think I was fully aware of it until that moment, but I think that I did…”

“Then why did you lie?”

Ryo exhaled slowly, flopping down to the side of Kame on, well he didn’t know exactly whose bed they were on, though he had a vague idea they were in one of the juniors’ houses. “I was scared, the way you looked at me…I was worried about your reaction…”

Kame’s face fell a little “Well I was happy about it…”

“Then why did you laugh at me?”

“I didn’t laugh”

Ryo leaned up on his elbow, mouth gaping a little “Yes you did…that laugh has been haunting me for 6 years, so don’t even try to deny it”

Kame laughed again, only not the mocking laugh from before, it was something sweet, doting. “I’m sorry if I laughed “I was embarrassed, and you know me, I was too proud to admit I’d liked it when you said it was a mistake.”

“Hey wait a second…” Ryo said slyly, a smile creeping back onto his face “If you liked it that much…then does that mean you liked me too?”

Kame’s cheeks were a little red, though Ryo couldn’t be entirely sure if that was from embarrassment, or if they were just flushed from the amount of alcohol he’d drunk. “I think I’ve liked you ever since.”

A swell if happiness rose through Ryo’s chest and he pressed his lips hard against Kame’s “You idiot, why didn’t you say something…I’ve liked you all this time too”

“How was I supposed to know?” Kame chuckled as Ryo continued to press hard kisses against his lips. “Idiot”.

They both laughed and Ryo was about to pull Kame to him, to pick up where they left off just a few minutes ago, but the slight drunkenness to Kame’s laugh had him hesitating. “I don’t think we should do this right now…”

Kame pouted “But we like each other don’t we?”

Ryo nodded “But, you’re drunk…”

Kame snorted “I’m not too drunk to know what I’m doing…”

“I know” Ryo reasoned “But still…we’ve waited 6 years for this, a few more weeks won’t hurt. I’ve done this before with more people than I can count…but I care about you…I want us to have a relationship first, to talk and make sure this is what we want…”

Kame laughed, but his expression showed he was pleasantly surprised. “You know you’re kind of gay…”

Ryo smiled “It would be a bit of a problem if I wasn’t…”

~~~

Ryo was quickly learning that this relationship was harder than he’d imagined. Over the next few weeks he was working mostly in Osaka, and since Kame was busy filming in Tokyo, they only managed to see each other a handful of times and even then it was only at the Jimusho. He made sure to call when he had the time though, after 6 years of wanting this he wasn’t going to give up so easily.

“Hey you” Kame said, smile in his voice as he answered the phone. “What are you doing tomorrow?”

Ryo had to check his schedule ”Hhhm, bangumi filming until lunch time then just a little meeting with my manager…why? You’re working aren’t you?”

He smiled at the delight in Kame’s chuckle “Not in the evening. I still have baseball stuff until the afternoon but the movie filming got cancelled since one of the sets got damaged with rain…It’ll mean extra work next week, but I’ll have tomorrow evening free…”

Ryo exhaled sharply “I can be in Tokyo by…probably 4pm.”

“Let me know when you’re on the train and if I’m finished I’ll pick you up from the station.”

“I can’t wait” Ryo replied eagerly and he meant it too.

“Sweet dreams Ryo-chan” Kame replied smugly before hanging up and Ryo knew right then he wouldn’t be getting any sleep at all.

~~~

It had felt like 4pm would never come, but there he was, just a little after the proposed time, and Kame rushing forward to meet him, a quick friendly hug for the sake of the public and then he was leading him back to his fancy sports car.

The drive didn’t take too long but Ryo’s feet were tapping nervously the whole way, his legs beginning to shake when Kame’s hand found his.

He never been to Kame’s house before, not this one at least, but he was surprised with how bright and clean and beautiful it was.

“I’ll give you the tour later…but first I’d like to show you the bedroom.” Kame smirked at him, taking his hand again and leading him off down a hallway.

Kame’s bedroom was huge, the bed occupying a large proportion of it was covered with crisp white silk sheets, and the whole room smelt like fresh flowers.

“Wow” Ryo almost gaped, looking around.

Kame’s eyes were alight with excitement “I finally get you in my bedroom and you’re only interested in the décor?”

Ryo laughed and turned his attention back to Kame “It’s not as beautiful as you”

Kame wrapped his arms around Ryo’s waist, drawing him closer “That’s more like it…” and when Ryo let out a shaky sigh he giggled “You’re not nervous are you?”

He could feel his cheeks heating up, but he shook his head anyway, laughing a little breathlessly, until Kame’s lips closed over his.

“I love you Ryo-chan” Kame whispered between kisses, and Ryo’s grip tightened in Kame’s shirt.

“I love you too”.

He couldn’t say who made the first steps towards the bed, but he pushed gently down onto it, Kame’s hands already sneaking under his shirt as Kame climbed over him, legs either side of Ryo’s hips.

He couldn’t help a slight groan, but then Kame was leaning down, swallowing the rest of his noises in kisses.

He was surprised at how slowly Kame was moving, he’d always imagined Kame being an animal in the bedroom, and one much faster than his name suggested. But his clothes came off slowly, Kame taking the time to shower kisses over each new patch of skin he revealed, and by the time his boxers came off, Ryo was achingly hard.

“Please” he begged as Kame trailed warm, wet lips along his length. “Please, oh fuck, please.”

The chuckle that left Kame’s lips was breathless, and he licked just once, teasingly, before moving back to remove all of his own clothes in one go.

Ryo had spent, he didn’t know exactly how long, but it was a lot of time over the years, imagining Kame’s naked body, and now, presented with it, hard and ready for him, he almost lost it.

He sat up, pulling Kame closer by the hips, running his hands over milky skin that was softer than any girl’s. He savoured the look in Kame’s eyes, like smouldering fire, as he slid his hand down, fingers ghosting over his solid arousal.

“Ryo” Kame moaned, slapping away his hand, but then his face lit up in a cheeky grin as he pushed Ryo back down onto the bed, climbing atop him once more.

It felt like fire when their skin connected, burning white where Kame ground their hips together, his voice coming out in pants against Ryo’s throat.

His hand found Kame’s hair, pulling his head up to find those sinful lips, nipping and sucking at them as Kame’s pitch got higher.

And then Kame was pulling away, hand reaching under his pillow to pull out the necessaries and Ryo heaved a desperate sigh of relief, feeling like he’d never needed Kame so badly.  He also needed to kiss him more, to feel Kame’s skilled tongue working against his own, and he groaned when Kame answered his silent plea as he lay down beside Ryo.

He shuddered under Kame’s palm as it trailed feather-light touches down his chest, closing around his erection and stroking once, twice and then letting go and moving further down, further back.

Ryo bolted up, gripping onto Kame’s arm as their startled expressions met, Kame’s eyebrows furrowed just a little in confusion. “Wait…no, I’m not…I don’t…”

He knew his cheeks were flushing, Kame’s were a little too, but then he was sitting up, facing Ryo and Ryo gulped. “You don’t want to…?” Kame asked, a little hurt.

“I do…I really, really do…but…I’ve never been with another man, and I’m just…not comfortable with…with…”

“With being the bottom?” Kame finished for him, and when he nodded Kame’s lips fell into a pout “But I’m not a bottom either…”

“What?” Ryo asked startled, he’d always just assumed that Kame, being rather more feminine in his tendencies would automatically be the more submissive kind.

“Why does everyone think I am…do I have some kind of sign on my forehead that says ‘Do me up the ass or something?’”

Ryo didn’t know how to respond, and in all honestly he felt a little guilty for just assuming. “Hey, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you…I just…thought...”

Kame shrugged, disappointment on his face as he flopped down to the bed “Well this is an…interesting scenario.”

Ryo felt a sudden stab of fear, after waiting so long for him, he did not want to lose Kame now, not over this. “It’s ok…we’ll…we can find something that works…a compromise.”

Kame’s eyes were a little sad, but there was hope in his voice “You think so?”

“Of course” Ryo smiled, leaning down to kiss away the sadness on his face “I told you already, I love you Kazuya...we’ll find a way to make it work…”. Kame bit his lip in an attempt to keep from smiling, but it only made him look cuter and Ryo chuckled, breaking out into his own grin “What did I ever do without you?” and he leaned down to lock their lips together again.

“You’re actually a really sweet guy” Kame murmured against his lips, and Ryo was about to retort when his stomach gave a loud grumble that caused them both to laugh. “Do you want to get something to eat now?”

He considered lying for just a moment, but he knew that the moment was gone anyway “Sure, let’s go find something.”

They rolled opposite ways and climbed off the bed, dressing in only their boxers before heading out into the kitchen where Kame reeled off a long list of dishes he could make them.

~~~

After their meal, which was eaten without ceremony, still dressed only in their underwear in front of the TV, Kame insisted on washing and putting away all of the pots before reclining once again on the sofa.

They sat for a little while, Kame leaning back against Ryo as Ryo’s fingers combed through his hair, and then he turned to look up at Ryo “You know…I got some new bath oil the other day, if you wanted, we could…take a bath together.”

He couldn’t tell if Kame’s tone was implying the same thing his own mind was, but with his earlier arousal starting to trickle along his veins, he was eager for any kind of contact. “Yeah…that’d be nice.”

Kame’s smile was still warm, unreadable as he flicked off the TV, taking Ryo by the hand to lead him to the bathroom.

Ryo gasped, it was more luxurious looking than any hotel bathroom he’d seen, the walls and floor tiled in cream and black marble. The shower was huge, taking up most of one wall, and the bath that occupied the opposite corner was beautiful, not as large as he would have expected, but larger than his own.

Kame laughed a little and pushed past him, moving to fill the tub with hot water. When the taps were going he poured a few drops of oil into the water and then moved to the light switches, playing around with dials until the lighting was low and romantic.

“Wow” was all Ryo could say as he glanced around the room, eyes landing on Kame as he sauntered closer, fingers playing teasing with the waistband of his boxers. “You’re going to be _really_ disappointed when you come over to my place…”

But Kame just laughed, shaking his head as he closed the distance between them, gentle nips across his bottom lip “I won’t be disappointed so long as you’re there, as for everything else…we’ll find a way to make it work.”

He could feel Kame hardening against him as their lips slid together, Kame’s tongue pushing it’s way into his mouth and he couldn’t help the surprised moan that vibrated through his throat.

His hands wound around Kame, pulling him closer and gripping into his flesh, shaking with the urge to tug off the clothing between them. But then Kame beat him to it, pushing his own boxers down to the floor before repeating the action on Ryo and sliding a hand between them to stroke them together.

Ryo’s body jerked, and he groaned louder, nails biting into Kame’s hips, even as his own bucked against Kame’s hand. And then he was being pushed back into Kame’s bathroom counter and Kame’s hand snuck into one of the drawers, returning with a bottle of baby oil.

They whimpered in unison as Kame released them, breaking their kiss as he poured a decent amount of baby oil into his hand, and then it was back, smoother and slicker, massaging the oil into them both, rubbing the excess across their stomachs before trailing the hand away to Ryo’s hips, pulling them together.

He couldn’t have stopped his hips from thrusting if his life depended on it, but if the feel of Kame pushing back against him was anything to go by, Kame couldn’t either.

“Is this ok for you?” Kame half moaned, half whispered into his ear, but all Ryo could do was nod and moan, one hand clawing desperately at Kame’s hip as the other slid up to his hair, pulling him back to his mouth in urgent kisses.

He was certain he couldn’t hold on long, but with every fibre of his being he strained to last, his breath choking out against Kame’s tongue with the force of the rising pressure. Until eventually Kame’s grip tightened, his whole body going rigid as the hard flesh pulsed against Ryo’s, warm fluid trickling over the tip of his cock, and he had to let go.

Ryo almost screamed as his release hit him, the pleasure burning into him from all directions, singeing his nerves until he could do nothing but slump forward against the man holding him.

Kame held him just a little longer, rubbing soothing circles across his back as they tried to calm their breathing. And then Kame stood him up, fixing an earnest expression on him as he rubbed his arms gently “Are you ok?”

Ryo’s face broke into a breathless grin “You’re incredible.” And he pulled Kame back to him, placing a hard kiss onto his smiling lips, until Kame managed to wriggle his way out of his hold.

“The bath…” he chuckled, and went over to switch off the taps. “Well that was good timing.” And with a cheeky grin he slid straight in, shuffling into the corner to make room for Ryo.  



	3. It Started with Little Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It started with little things, just little annoyances that time and distance help get the better of them.

It started with little things, plectrums left littering his coffee table, wet towels left in heaps on his bathroom floor, DVDs left in the player.

“Ryo~” he almost whined down the phone. “I asked you before not to leave pots in the sink right?”

“Sorry Kazu...” he replied, and Kame could hear the pout on his lips. “I was in a hurry to get the train so I didn't have time to do them...”

“How could you not have time” Kame pouted back “You didn't leave until dinnertime did you?”

“I know...but I was playing guitar and I totally lost track of time and then I had to run, I'm sorry Kazu, I promise it won't happen again”

Kame wasn't the type to give in so easily, but part of him just couldn't resist Ryo. “It's OK, I'll let you off this time...but next time you'll be in trouble.”

~~~

The next time he remembered about the pots, but to Kame's surprise, when he went to do his laundry he found not only an extra stack of towels to wash, as there usually was when Ryo came to stay, but also half of Ryo's clothes.

“Am I your maid now?” Kame half snapped when Ryo answered the phone.

“Kazu~” Ryo groaned sleepily “It's half two in the morning.”

“It is...I've just gotten home from work and I have an extra huge pile of laundry to do now...do you want to explain that to me?”

Ryo huffed down the phone “You don't need to wash my things, just leave them in the laundry basket and I'll do them when I'm back next.”

“And when will that be? You want me to just leave dirty clothes hanging around in my room for weeks until you get round to doing it?” and he hung up the phone before Ryo had chance to reply.

Heaving a tired sigh he grabbed the washing basket, and loaded the washing machine with his own clothes and as much of Ryo's as would fit.

With that done, he headed to the fridge to have a nice, refreshing glass of juice before trying to get some sleep. Only as he opened the door to put the juice away again he noticed the lack of milk.

Angrily he grabbed his phone again and dialled Ryo's number. “Did you use all the milk?” he snapped.

“Shit!” came Ryo's tired groan. “I'm sorry, I forgot to leave a note...”

“A note?!” Kame exclaimed. “What good is a note when you know I finish work so late? I'm out early tomorrow too, now I'm going to have to get up extra early in the morning to go and get some...”

“Well, I'm sorry, I should have gone to get more then...”

“It's fine...whatever...”

He heard Ryo's sigh and a little shuffling that he presumed was Ryo rolling over in bed. “It's not fine, you're pissed at me...I'm sorry, OK?”

“I know you are...just, I can't help feeling like you treat my house like a hotel sometimes, but I'm busy enough as it is without running around cleaning up after you Ryo...”

“Well maybe you should come and visit me every once in a while then...you know it's technically been 5 months since we started dating and you haven't even been here once...if anything, aren't I the one running around after you?” Ryo replied, his voice just a little tight.

“You know how busy I am...you knew that 5 months ago” Kame retorted.

“I work too you know? My job is the same as yours...”

“Yeah, but...” Kame started, but Ryo cut him off.

“But nothing...you signed up for all those different things all at once, and I know it's because your work is important to you, but maybe it's time you had a serious think about how important I am to you?”

Kame laughed, but it was one of those desperate, humourless half-laughs “How did we get here from you drinking all my milk?”

“Let's talk about it some other time OK? You should get some sleep.”

~~~

Kame did think about it, a lot. He really cared about Ryo and he wanted things to work between them, but unless they started putting in more effort, both of them, then he didn't see how it could.

He checked over his schedule for the next week, there was only one day that he started work after noon, but the night before wasn't too late, so he decided to make his move then.

Really, he'd wanted it to be a surprise, but the last thing he needed was to waste his time running off to Osaka only to find Ryo wasn't available.

“Are you free Thursday evening?” he asked hopefully when Ryo picked up the phone. A drawn out 'hmm' and some shuffling papers told him that Ryo was checking his schedule.

“Yeah, I finish around 6pm, oh, no I start at 9am on Friday, so I won't be able to come through...”

“Actually...I was thinking of coming to you for a change...”

There was silence for a moment, and then a deep breath “Kazu, is this about what I said the other night? I was just tired and grumpy...I know you're too busy right now...”

“I'm busy, but I don't want to be too busy for you Ryo...we said we'd make it work right?” he pouted back.

“And we will, but...”

“But nothing” he insisted “I want to come and see you...”

Ryo sighed “Yeah, OK...I mean thank you...you don't need to, but I'll be happy to see you.”

“Well OK then” he replied “I'll check with my manager if I can't get out of work a little early, and then I'll let you know what time I'll be there.”

~~~

Luckily Kame did manage to get out a little early, he put in extra effort to get his photo-shoot finished earlier, and then he grabbed his overnight bag before calling for a taxi to take him to the station.

He was lucky enough to get straight onto the next bullet train too, but it was still around 8pm before he managed to get to Osaka.

Ryo was there waiting for him when he stepped out of the station, leaning against his car with his hands in the pockets of his smart leather jacket. He was wearing a disguise, an old beany and a pair of large, dark sunglasses, but if anything, Kame thought it made him stand out more, who looks that cool just waiting at a train station?

Ryo's lips turned up in a smile when he spotted Kame, and Kame felt weightless for a moment at the knowledge that that look was directed at him.

Ryo took his bag from him and put it into the boot of his car before walking around to open the passenger door for Kame. And then they made their way back to Ryo's place.

“Thank you...it means a lot to me that you made the effort to come out here.” was the only thing Ryo said on the way, and Kame watched the surroundings pass them by before Ryo pulled into a parking garage.

He didn't have time to look around Ryo's apartment before he was being pressed into the wall of it, warm lips fast on his. He reached out to take Ryo by the hips, pulling him closer and arching a little into his hold as one hand moved firmly up from his chest to his face.

The kiss was incredible, intense and relieved like breath after almost drowning, but it was over too soon, and Ryo was peeling himself away from Kame's body.

“Food first.” Ryo insisted, and Kame could hardly disagree, he hadn't eaten since breakfast and even if he'd tried to tell Ryo he wasn't hungry, the noises his stomach was making would reveal his lie.

~~~

“If there'd have been more time I would have made something a bit fancier” Ryo said with an apologetic smile, but Kame shook his head.

“Osakan food, made by a real Osakan, you can't beat that.” and Ryo just laughed shyly. “So...what's for desert?”

Ryo blushed, but his lips were turning up at the corners, and Kame had a pretty good idea of what he'd had in mind for desert.

Ryo leaned in first, cupping Kame's cheek gently with one hand while bracing himself against the back of the sofa with the other, and he pressed their lips together in the gentlest of touches “I missed you” he whispered out over Kame's lips.

“I missed you too” Kame replied, breathier than he'd meant, and he pushed himself forward from the sofa, leaning more into the kiss. “How about you show me your bedroom.”

Ryo looked a little sheepish as he opened the door to it, it was much smaller and less fancy than Kame's but it was cosy and homely, the sheets silk like his own only black in colour. He wandered in and took a quick look around before settling himself in the centre of the bed, patting the space beside him.

Ryo's shirt was already falling to the floor as he climbed atop Kame, pulling his shirt from his body too and tossing it to the floor before pushing him gently to lay down.

Kame let him take control, watching in silent awe as the defined muscles in Ryo's shoulders and abs, shifted with his every movement, how his hands shook slightly as he pulled the rest of their clothes from their bodies.

He groaned as Ryo lay down atop him, their heated flesh connecting the same time as Ryo's lips connected with his throat, kissing softly and then nipping as his hips rolled into motion.

Faster and faster, Ryo's hips, grinding into his and it was all too much but not enough and he whined for more. Ryo answered his plea, lifting his hips enough to shove a hand between them, wrapping it around them both and it was better but not what he wanted. No matter how much he let his imagination drift, no matter how much he fantasized about what they were doing, Ryo's hand just couldn't compare.

“What are you thinking?” Ryo panted against his lips, and it was the strangeness of the question that made Kame realise his face was contorted in an expression that could only be desperation, but he shook his head, lucid enough to know that this wasn't the right time to discuss it.

Ryo clearly had other ideas though, and he stopped his motions, focusing entirely on Kame until he finally opened his eyes, looking up into Ryo's concerned face. “It's not important right now” he wheezed, bucking his hips a little to remind Ryo of what they were doing, but Ryo's hand released them altogether, and he sat back on his heels, regarding Kame with a hurt expression.

“It's important to me...you're not here with me, in your head at least...you're thinking of something else...is it...have you found somebody else?”

He shook his head as quickly as he could “No, Ryo I swear, you're the only one I want...I just...I know we said we would make it work...but I want more of you...I want...”

“You want to have sex?” Ryo asked, his expression a little bewildered. “That's what this is about?”

“Yes...I like what we've done so far and I want to keep doing all those things, just...”

“Just...you want to have sex...” Ryo finished for him. And then after a few moments of silence he continued “If you're willing to bottom then we can do it right now...but...I'm not ready to...do that...yet...”

Kame was clutching at straws “I swear I'd be really gentle Ryo...and if you didn't like it...if you wanted to stop, then I promise I would...”

But Ryo's head was shaking before he even got his sentence out “It's not that I don't trust you Kazu, it's just that this is all so new...and there's too much I haven't discovered about myself yet...”

“Then let's discover together...I'll help you...”

Ryo let out a sigh “Kazu, I'm not saying never...I just, need some time first, but if you think it's that easy then why don't we 'discover' first on you...”

“I don't like it...I already know I don't.” he admitted, suddenly feeling like their position was a little inappropriate for this conversation. Ryo seemed to have noticed that too and he slid off Kame's body, coming to sit beside him and pull the covers over his quickly fading erection.

“What do you mean...have you been with other men?” Ryo asked, almost incredulously.

He could feel his face heating up but he knew lying now would only come back to bite him later “Yes...a few...”

Ryo's face fell, but his eyes looked angry “How many is a few? And who? Who is so important to you that you'll let them fuck you in the ass but you won't let me?”

He felt like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming truck, and he couldn't find the right way to word what he wanted to say. “Just two...only two have done it to me...”

“Who?” Ryo demanded again “And what do you mean only two have done it to you, who have you done it to?”

He shook his head, it hadn't meant to sound like that, it was the truth but he hadn't meant to put it so bluntly, and he was actually starting to feel a little annoyed at Ryo's pushiness. “Does it matter who? The point is that I've done it...and I didn't like it...but you won't even try it for me...”

“Yes it does matter who” Ryo snapped back, “If there's been two then you must have tried it with somebody else after you knew you didn't like it...who was so important....”

“Kimura-sempai” Kame cut in, just wanting to get it over with. “It was Tackey first, and then I tried again for Kimura-sempai.” he turned his head away so that he wouldn't have to see the shock and hurt in Ryo's eyes.

“Tackey I can kind of understand...but Kimura-sempai? I didn't even know you were close...”

The hurt in Ryo's voice alone is enough to have Kame feeling ashamed “We're not really...just, on the set of his drama there was...tension and we just...”

“I see” Ryo answered after a pause “So you're that kind of person...”. There was silence for a few moments and Kame felt as though his world was crashing down, little did he know that it was about to get a whole lot worse. “What about the juniors? If you fuck guys you're not even close with I can't imagine what you get up to with them...”

He nodded slowly “A few...mostly kisumai”

Ryo was shaking his head “ I can't believe this...do you even have any morals at all?”

Kame looked up at his face finally, hurt and a little angry at the disgusted expression he found there. “I don't see what it matters who I've slept with...I'm with you now Ryo and I swear I've never done anything to be unfaithful to you, nor will I ever...I don't deserve for you to treat me like this”

“You're just not the person I thought you were...the things you've done...I was saving myself for you...”

Kame couldn't help the burst of laughter “Saving yourself for me? Ryo you've fucked more girls than I've had hot dinners.”

“But never with a guy...you would have been my first...”

“I'm flattered that you're thinking of it that way Ryo but isn't it just because you were scared? If I hadn't have kissed you that night you'd be huddled up here all alone tonight trying to convince yourself you're straight!” he snapped a little.

Ryo's face turned cold “I'd rather be huddled up here all alone than even looking at you right now.”

He could feel anger bubbling up under his skin but he held his breath, not wanting to say something he might regret, and then after fully considering his words he barked out “Well why don't you just do that then...I don't have time for this shit.” and he got up from the bed, pulling his clothes on hurriedly as he made his way towards the door.

“Get out then” Ryo almost screamed after him “Go find someone else to fuck if it's that important to you...I'm sure you have a list of numbers you could call...”

He slammed the door behind him and as he stumbled out onto the street he seriously considered it. He'd always been pretty close with Uchi, if he got him drunk enough then he was confident he could get into Uchi's pants, that would hurt Ryo for sure.

But even before he'd finished the thought he knew it was a bad idea, and he felt like a real ass-hole for even thinking it. Instead he called for a taxi and he made his way back to Tokyo.


End file.
